I’ve been thinking about the places in my day where I go unconscious, on auto-pilot. I’ve been curious wondering, how did I become my own passenger on my own auto-pilot? How do I get to become more present? To slow down to actually be in choice again?
This can be very subtle, I can be going out to feed my horses and I can get swept up in a moment reminiscing, the “ever-present-past” comes and settles down inside. Then I’m not truly present anymore, I’m just going through the motions.
Yesterday I went to drive to see my grandkids when I was chatting on my headset to my aunt, and all of a sudden, I realized I was way past my turn off! So, it’s been getting my attention how many times in a day I can fall into auto-pilot. I recognize how much I enjoy it when I’m present and empowered to slow down my inner process to actually see my life and the choices that are available to me. To notice where I’m putting my energy in this life.
That brought up a whole other puzzle. When I go unconscious, I’m not aware where my energy is going. It’s just going where it’s always gone, and I keep doing what I’ve always done. No wonder I won’t be making any progress in the areas that I say I want to have progress. Until, I slow down and begin to notice that pattern.
So, slowing down and noticing the pattern in so important. One thing about noticing the pattern is that it can feel really vulnerable, because sometimes there’s a voice inside that says I’m supposed to know things before I’ve even learned them. That’s not really true.
When we can notice what lights us up. When we can notice what we really enjoy. When we can notice what we value, we can take the time to be with what we value bringing our soul into alignment with that. Then we can be freed up to be honest and own our experiences in the world.
One huge key I’ve found in my life that supports me is transparency. To have a giggle at some of those things I do when I go unconscious, rather than making it right or wrong. Just notice the pattern and unpack it a little bit so I can lay down a new pattern. One that has some gentleness with it, some warmth, and then I can be in choice.
Becoming aware of the infinite choices in each moment, it’s true it can be scary, and yet it is totally worth it.
Thanks for being with me on this journey. Healing You.